Stupid, Stiupid, STOOpid.

OMGoodness.

FML.

*Notice the font has gone from bright blue to a deep, wilting flower purple (That matches the color of Kiss Of Life) to reflect my crappy mood.*



I felt like crap.



And then I went to the store. Where there's a meat market. Where a particularly cute guy works. Who I've been waiting to talk to forever. Named David.



And I talked to him. And my MOM was there.



And it was my fault.



And I acted like a total idiot!



Mom: *Points to pickled pork skins* Those are those pickled pork skins!



Me: Ewwwwww *shudders cutely for David*



Mom: Grandpa used to buy those.



Me: AND EAT them?! *this is real disgust, folks*



Mom: YES.



David: Did you want to try them?



Me: NO, thankyou. *cute grossed out face*



David chuckles.



Me: You've gotta have guts to down those, I think.... Have you ever tried them?



David: Nah, I'm a really picky eater, so I don't eat stuff like that. I'm like really picky so all my food costs a lot.



Mom: Yeah, like lobster?



Him: Yeah, and like filet mingnon and stuff, but mostly I like red meat.



Me: ME TOO! *yum*



Mom: *rolls eyes*



Me: It's good for your SOUL~



Him: Yeah, I mena like last night I made myself some steak and homemade mashed potatoes.



Me is awed.



AND THIS IS WHERE I START TO HATE ME.



Me: Maybe you cna come over and make *me* dinner. FAKE HAHAS. I can bring soda.















I CAN BRING SODA??????????????!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!





*bangs head against Horton who is talking to Whos.*



SODA?!!?!





I'M SO STUPID!







I sold out and acted like a stupid girl- in front of my mother, no less, who will tell everyone what a STOOPID girl I am.



MY SHAME IS NEVER-ENDING.





...





And I just... I don't know... I'm all out of whack again and I don't know why and I keep having these weird... mood swing things... and Ivan tried to talk to me and I got all freaked out and weird and I don't even know why.



I just really hate it.



And I felt all alone today and I don't even know how.

And I feel like crap.

And I just want to dream about Sweets again so I can feel better again.

.... I don't want want to make it, I just want...

... I don't know what I want.

Zombies! DMV! Exclamation Points!

Bet you don't see that too often! LoL
quick bloggy-blog:
Went to the DMV today and was extra-special-super-excited because I couldn't help it and I'm really jazzed about getting my ID! (I'm no longer an invalid when it arrives in ten to fifteen business days!)
SO yeah, hope my picture was good, I tried to do the good smile, not the dumb one, and I vaguely remember straightening mah shoulders! Yeah!
Oh oh oh!!! Gen Dead II: Kiss Of Life, FINALLY came yesterday, so I'm reading it a lot because this weeks STAR testing, which is GREAT! Because we have like two blocks of testing and then tons of breaks and snacks and we just hang out. But today was MATH and I proved how dumb I am by checking "C" for every other one... Gah. And I forgot how to complete the square AND do logarithms AND exponent-ey problems. Gah!
Oh well, I mood swing-ed again for the first time in a few weeks, but since it went from sad to happy, I'm gonna let it slip... maybe I'll dream about Sweets from Bones again :D That solved my problems last time.

OMG- DANIEL WATERS! If you're reading this:
Though your first book was insightful, mind-blowing and ten thousand more superlatives that I don't even know right now- Kiss of Life is absolutely, positively speechless! I'm speechless, the way you wrote Adam's point of view is... astounding. I've officially run out of superlatives for you, Dan and just know that I love you (your writing, I know that sounds creepy, sorry) your concepts, everything and I've become a walking advertisement for you. Just know that. :D

Kay kay, loves, this is it. Remember: If you were a zombie- I'd still be your friend. :D

Now I have to go do homework... :D

Love,

-Bianca!

Brain Shrinking

Wow.
So I had a pretty crappy week before/after the whole birthday- 17- thing. And like. I was having these super weird mood swings- like 8;00 happy, 11:00 Suicidal (exaggeration), 3:00 ecstatic. And then I had a dream.
About Sweets. From Bones. (Didn't realize how hot he was until he revealed his abuse!)
And We chatted like he was my therapist. And he taught me a magic trick. The End.

And I'm better now. LoL.

And I just came back from Boca's- for my birthday that everybody forgot- and I got a camera. And money. SO I begged mommy to take me to B&N so I could spend the money- ON MY MARVEL BAG!!!
YEAH!

Things are better.

(Also I bought like $40 worth of stuff.... plus five. LoL)

Love,
-Bee!- wildered/dazzled.

PS. "William dahling could you pass the caviar?"